Headaches and Renos and Chaos, Oh My

Hey peeps, it’s a bit of a rough morning today.

Last week we had the bathroom renovated. It’s much safer for Sam now and I’ll post pictures once it’s painted. We had the tub removed and a full walk-in shower put in its place, new flooring and a new vanity put in. Finally, we no longer have to worry about Sam losing his balance and falling when he steps over the tub. And the tub was so narrow that it made it feel claustrophobic for both of us. So now we have a wide walk-in shower — well 30 inches wide seems spacious compared to the 17 inches of usable space we had with the tub, and the shower is five feet long. With a safe shower seat, it’s just much more ideal. And it looks nice.

But for me, any reno is stressful, and we had to corral the cats each day for three days.

I was desperately trying to finish revisions last week on Witching Moon in order to get it off to my editor because I got so far behind, that I feel like I’ve just had one big headache since week ago Monday.

My editor is working like crazy trying to get the book back to me so we can get it uploaded. If by any chance I need to delay it again, it will only be by a few days.

Everything was going just fine until the whole Covid-19 mess hit, and that just threw everything off. Even though I work from home, the chaos felt so intense, and the worry was so strong, that I — like a number of people — had a rough time focusing.

I’m very happy with how the book came out, but it was like pulling teeth at a few points to force myself to sit in front of the computer and do anything more than want to play Stardew Valley. I’ve heard of the game for a while, I only recently give it a try and was immediately addicted. It’s a very calming game, and I can just spend hours roaming around doing stuff. But needless to say, my attention and focus was shot.

Also, I’ve been worrying about my niece, who has been dealing with Covid — she’s starting to slowly get better. But it’s going to take weeks for a full recovery and she’s had it for a month. She didn’t end up in the hospital, but it hit her really hard and she was home alone because none of us could go down there to be with her because we have compromised immune systems, like she does.

Anyway, the stress of last week on top of the stress of the past month or so just kind of did me in. I’m exhausted today. I’m taking this week off, and I have moved in the release date for Autumn’s Bane to late August, to give me breathing room.

I know a lot of you been feeling the same way, or worse, and I empathize. I had one hell of a reaction the night before last, which started at about 4 AM and kept me awake until 6:30 AM. It was rough, and I still hurt from it. The aches and pains that can come with these reactions can be rough, and I just want a really good night sleep and to be able to sleep in.

Unfortunately that didn’t happen today. I woke up to a phone call from my lawn care guys at 8 AM asking me to kindly get my ass (no, they didn’t put it that way) outside so that I could approve some work they’re doing. Now, I needed to approve it, but last night I didn’t get to sleep until about 2 AM. My sleep pattern is totally gotten off track during the past couple of months.

And then it’s been harder to focus given the protests that are going on nationwide. I worry about our country and about the injustices that are everywhere within it. I realize that even with all of my issues, I do have a lot of privilege, and I try to use that as best as I can. There’s no way I can be out on the front lines marching, but I look for ways to help. Warning: if you follow me on Twitter, you’ll see a lot of political stuff.

The disparities in our nation are impossible to ignore, and impossible to deny. I do not understand how people can look at what’s going on and say we don’t have serious problems. While I tend to focus more on women’s rights, disability rights, and LGBQT issues, so many of those overlap with racial issues, and they all need attention.

I also realize that I can’t do anything if I’m exhausted hand unable to focus, so I am taking this week off. My MCAS has been in a flare for months and I don’t need it any worse. But my heart is there in my spirit are there, with those marching for justice, and I am doing what I can to help.

Bright Blessings, peeps, and I really hope this week sees you in good health and strength—both inner and outer.