Coven Etiquette

Each coven will have its own standards of behavior and right action. When you work ritual with others, especially in a coven that is centered around deity worship and magic, you must be able to trust the other members. Perfect love and perfect trust are not just words to mouth and they mean far more than what the general perception tends to be.

But, even outside of a coven, when you attend a public pagan/magical ritual, there will be certain expectations of etiquette. Pay attention. These are not free-for-all, democratic rituals. Find out what the expectations are before going. When in doubt, some of the most common points of etiquette are:

  • Be on time.
  • No screaming or excessive curse words.
  • Do not slander your coven mates or spread malicious gossip.
  • Honor your word—loyalty, trust, and honesty are absolutely vital.
  • Do not attend Circle meetings, even if casual, in dirty clothes, unless specifically part of the ritual.
  • Always bring your BOS and Magical tool kit.
  • Learn to keep silence. Keep all secrets you are entrusted with.
  • Keep chit-chat to pre-meeting and post-Circle times. If you need to discuss things about the day, vent, etc., it should be before official start of Circle Meeting. Notice the tone of the ritual. Solemn rituals are not the place for inappropriate joking. Don’t disrupt the ritual with off-topic comments. If the fire refuses to start and the candles tip over, yes, there may be joking or laughing, but don’t go off on a tangent that shifts the energy away from the focus of the ritual.
  • NEVER touch another person’s ritual tools without asking.
  • NEVER touch the altar without asking first.
  • NEVER play another person’s drum, etc., without permission.
  • Do not attempt to step in if something goes askew during ritual, unless you are asked for help or unless it’s an emergency. Otherwise, wait patiently for the High Priestess to address the issue.
  • If you attend a public ritual and something feels off to you, quietly excuse yourself before ritual and leave.
  • Never leave Circle once it’s cast unless you are given permission, and then remember to open a “door” and close it after you step out of Circle.
  • Never instruct the High Priestess in what she should be doing.
Basic Coven Etiquette
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